i wish doctors could replace broken hearts, suck out insecurities
and
doubts, and heal problems with a bandage and cherry tootsie-pop. i
wish happiness grew from trees, in everybody’s backyard. i wish
love saved lives, not electrical machines, not the amount of money
poured into a well-kept hospital room. i wish i understood what
engendered such hatred, enough to crash yourself and a dozen innocent
lives, women and children, into a building. i wish a matter of
heart and blood flow couldn’t ruin a family. i wish regrets could
melt away like a hot summer day. i wish the land we walk on and the
waters we swim in would stop creating havoc. i wish everybody has
friends. i wish good will always prevail over evil. i wish the word
‘suicide’ was as foreign as what lingers upon the ocean floor. i wish
people would find joy in a sunset or a baby’s laughter, not in
another’s pain. i wish the option of killing a wasn’t optional. i wish
the world isn’t the
way it is.

i wish a lot of things, but my action falls short.

it’s 3:30, and i’m too deep into thought to really focus. i can’t even
read a paragraph nor close my eyes for that matter. i feel like i drank four cans of red bull. shrug; today was a long
day.

i still don’t want to go to school tomorrow, but then my mom’s
going to kill me and have to go through the hassle of wiping up my blood and disposing my body. she doesn’t deserve that.

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